fritters.

shitters.

ill-fitters.

glitters.

mittenrs.

jitters.

kitters.

litters.

fritters.

starflbucks

hater of things that i am, i say without any semblance of okness or acceptance, that i hauled ass (a growing amount of it) for close to an hour looking for a starbucks. is it me, or did more places used to have "free wifi!"? I am a freelance (read: scared of a 'real' job) person who doesn't like being trapped at home (read: i just set a 'real' trap at my home for the very 'real' mouse ((read: rat)) that is plaguing my life and haunting my dreams) so i wander around, killing time i should be charging someone for by working, to find a cute, indie, do-gooder cafe where they don't mind that i nurse one drink while i soak up their 'free' wifi and electricity to power my obnoxiously silver non do-gooder mac. so lacking that, i sit in a starbucks. norah jones: check. $2.50 bottle of water: check. writing a contradictorily confused blog post after freaking out that I was wasting time finding a place with internet: fuck.

brooklyn burning rubber smells

smells like smelting. don't know what that is, but i really like the word and wish i had invented it.

But Brooklyn really does smell like what I imagine smelting smells like. like hot sticky tar. Like burning plastic, wires, rubber.... are you thinking what i'm thinking? An adult toy factory was lit on fire by anti-sex'ers? Terminator's war of the computer / robots theory is finally being realized? or maybe Jersey did more fucked up stuff to pollute the skies and aren't going to stop until the north-east USA is a smudge on the map...?

How can you tell if you are really sick or just not wanting to go to work?

I can't tell...

i mean i know i feel like ass. SOmebody elses flacid ass. But i have the feeling that if i wanted to, i could power on through.

but then there are those times, when you think - fuck it i gotta go into work today - and then you are all sweaty and headrushy on the train and think how short life is, and how irrelevant one more day will be at the office for everyone else there but you and thats only because you feel like shit.

i know work isn't allll pointless (do i??). or some work isnt... but one day?! c'maaaaan.

yeah i took the day off work today.

Leather gloves

Where is the line between creepy and classy leather gloves?
I won't wear them for fear of being "too fancy lady" or "primed for jail time."
I looked for a long time to see what the distinction was.... no luck.

Maybe faux fur? color?
no. they are all made for murderers. fancy murderers or self-aware murderers, they all like to strangle and drive.

Wikipedia:Leather Glove: Common uses

A common use for leather gloves is sporting events. In baseball, a baseball glove is an oversized leather glove with a web used for fielding the ball. Leather gloves also factor into playing handball. Cyclists also use leather gloves. Leather gloves are also used frequently by football players so that they can more easily grip the ball. Leather gloves also provide protection from occupational hazards. For example, beekeepers use leather gloves to avoid being stung by bees. Construction workers might also use leather gloves for added grip and for protecting their hands. Welders use gloves too for protection against electrical shocks, extreme heat, ultraviolet and infrared. (blahblahblah)

Some people also have a fetish revolving around leather gloves.

(i increased font size...)

Closest I could find to proof that leather gloves are for killing.

Onwards and forwards....

Spare time

such a scam!

no such thing. never spare time.

like right now - i SHOULD be working. but instead, I am on the computer doing this stupid shit.

or like yesterday, when I left work 2 hours earlier than most people, and spent the time wandering around wasting time looking at shitty shit made in china with synthetic materials that made me itchy just by looking at them. and then i bought some of it. that wasn't spare time, that was time that needed to be spent doing work I'm avoiding right now or cleaning my place up or at least getting out of bed.

i often wonder what I would do with spare time... probably this.

Join this group: GroupHaters

Its like this pathetic rebellionism from my long lost rebel without a cause youth that I never had.

I get into some virginal panic when I say something and someone joins in agreement with me.

I'll change sides when I'm arguing something and see too many heads nod.

Makes me feel like I'm on a roll so i get too comfy, knowing that somebody is just waiting - WAITING - for you to fuck it up by saying the safety (you-crossed-the-line-and-fell-off-your-roll) word. I'm not about to "hear, hear" or "here here" or whatever somebody else when I don't know what the hell they are gonna say next.

But I am not even controversial. Run of the mill non-group-ers have it hard.

Joining a group on PURPOSE!?! like one that didn't magnetically form around you when you said some funny shit?? that makes me want to hyperventilate in order to breathe enough oxygen so my head doesn't shrink like grandpa scrotum.

as soon as you are in a group, there's making plans for "us," there's "for the good of the group," there's "thinking on behalf of others" and " democracy," high fives and "don't shit where you eat."

no.

i want a group of people who hate stuff. Maybe a set of rules (who should hate rules too.)
Rules to join "group of hater group haters"
1. you hate groups.
2. you want to know about other people who hate groups and why.
3. you want to hear stories of haterism. and hate on them.
4. you hate this post.